


Game

by Ukiyo (Im_choking_help)



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: M/M, Nekoma
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-02
Updated: 2020-07-02
Packaged: 2021-03-04 17:40:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,207
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25040284
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Im_choking_help/pseuds/Ukiyo
Summary: In which kuroken are dumb and blind to each others feelings and yaku and hinata are done with dealing that"Yaku, Mother of the Cats, had known for quite some time now. Kuroo invoked his suspicions and caught on rather quickly. It was easy to figure out the bed haired cat but Kenma not so much. While they had been best friends since childhood, Kuroo couldn't read all of his faces. The one that frustrated him the most was the look Kenma would give him when he flirted. But while that was the hardest for Kuroo to decipher, it was the easiest for Yaku. Yaku didn't know much about love (though there was a certain Russian cat who could put that to the test) but it was obvious what Kenma was saying.That he too was in love. "
Relationships: kuroken
Kudos: 19





	Game

kuroken idea - kenma "i've always look at you as an achievement in a game"

Kuroo had been in love with his childhood friend for years. You could say since he had first laid eyes on him. He had been completely and utterly fallen for him. And he continued to do so over and over again. He was very obvious about it. It was obvious to everyone, except his love himself.

In Kenma's defense though, Kuroo flirted with pretty much everyone. Most people only wanted him for his looks but Kuroo never let it go farther than flirting. So while everyone assumed he was a fuckboy, Kenma knew for the most part that it wasn't true. He may have had 2 or 3 girlfriends in the past, only lasting a couple of months before breaking up for a stupid reason. 

To Kuroo, it wasn't a stupid reason. That's what it seemed like to everyone else though. He always gave them a stupid lie. For example, they just couldn't agree on who the mystery pokemon was at the end of each episode. Kuroo of course would be right because he's a nerd and he'd say that he couldn't be with someone who wasn't a pokemon expert. And somehow no one ever thought about if Kuroo was shallow enough to do that. The truth was is that he could never get his pudding haired best friend out of his head. Whenever he had been with a girlfriend, he felt like he was betraying them both. He just couldn't do relationships, not one that wasn't with Kenma. 

The question that remained was did Kenma feel the same? There were only 2 people that knew the answer to that. One had figured it out on his own and the other Kenma had told. He didn't even know the answer til someone had pointed it out. He had thought the feelings Kuroo gave him were weird but he never questioned it further. 

Yaku, Mother of the Cats, had known for quite some time now. Kuroo invoked his suspicions and caught on rather quickly. It was easy to figure out the bed haired cat but Kenma not so much. While they had been best friends since childhood, Kuroo couldn't read all of his faces. The one that frustrated him the most was the look Kenma would give him when he flirted. But while that was the hardest for Kuroo to decipher, it was the easiest for Yaku. Yaku didn't know much about love (though there was a certain Russian cat who could put that to the test) but it was obvious what Kenma was saying.

That he too was in love. 

What gave it away the most was the way Kenma was around him. The tips of his ears would light up every so slightly. His tone would go from bored to fascinated. A smile threatening to break through his facade. He would use his hair to hide his face even more. His words would come out more quietly. To the point where Kuroo would have to bend down to hear him (which was actually a tactic Kenma used to get him closer). But what gave him away the most was the way he looked at Kuroo. At first Yaku thought that look was towards the game, since he looking down at it most of the time.

But the truth was Kenma couldn't handle looking at Kuroo. He feared that his heart would burst and the butterflies would gnaw their way out of his stomach and his mouth would betray and tell him the very things he didn't want to say. On the rare instances he did glance at Kuroo, his eyes would hold such an endearing vision. One that said all the things he felt without him needing to. They held love, compassion, astonishment, curiosity, and most of all, happiness. 

He felt happy when they were together. Mostly because sometimes Kuroo could say the stupidest things, it hurt to laugh. But the happiness would never last too long. Because his fear and anxiety would come back to bite him in the ass. Kenma was terrified of commitment. More terrified than any terror he felt towards Granny. To anyone who knew him, that spoke volumes. What he was scared of about a relationship was how his parents would react and also the fact that Kuroo was much further experienced. He already had his first kiss, had been on dates, and maybe had gone beyond that. Kenma wasn't too sure about the last one but Kuroo could have anyone with his looks so he had just assumed. 

When Kenma compared all that to what he had experienced,which was nothing, it put him down. What if upon having it, Kuroo would just drop him for someone else? Deciding that he wasn't enough and could never give him what he wanted? Those thoughts would always worm themselves into his brain, no matter how much he assured himself that Kuroo would never do that. That was enough to determine that he would just let his love for Kuroo just fade on its own. But that hadn't been very successful. It was quite the opposite in fact. His feelings only kept getting stronger. Kenma would just have to ignore it. 

He wasn't the only one with fears.

Kuroo had flirted sure, but he had never actually said it because he had his own fears. He feared that Kenma wouldn't return his feelings and he would lose his closest friend. Of course even if it did happen,Kuroo had promised himself he would get him back, even only as a friend. He also feared that Kenma was maybe in love with somebody else. A certain sunshine tangerine. Kenma had been hanging out with him even more now and that only helped to expand his suspicions and what ifs.

Just the thought killed him but if Kenma was happy then it was okay. It was okay. But of course it wasn't. Jealousy would just take over his whole being. He liked Hinata a lot. He was glad that Kenma managed to make a friend but Kuroo couldn't handle it becoming something more. Jealousy was the demon he would have to overcome before it escalates and everything gets ruined. 

They each had people they confided in the most. For Kuroo, it was Bokuto and Yaku. He relied more on Yaku who gave much more reasonable answers. Bokuto had just out right yelled at Akaashi that he loved him and they had started going out soon. So love hadn't been a challenge for him. All Bokuto had said when Kuroo told him his dilemma is that love is as easy as 1,2,3 and you just gotta go with the breeze. Kuroo thought that was bullshit and soon after started going to Yaku for advice. Yaku figured it would be best to encourage Kuroo to do it instead of outing Kenma. 

Kenma relied on Hinata,who was surprisingly good with love advice. Sadly, that did not apply with his own. Hinata liked Kageyama who despite multiple direct confessions, just could not catch on. It was sad seeing how dumb they were. It hurt the Karasuno team to watch. But that's for another time. Hinata had told Kenma to just throw all caution to the wind and stop worrying about what could possibly happen and just do it. He had told him that Kuroo would never want to harm him. But that didn't stop all his doubts. So whenever he needed reassurance, he would go to Hinata to feel better. That had started happening more often,which hurt Kuroo more than Kenma could ever know.

Kuroo also feared that he would be replaced as Kenma's best friend. He feared that more than rejection. The thought of it made him nauseous. Because before any romantic feelings, Kenma's friendship was much more valuable. 

To the 2 advisors(Hinata,Yaku), it was painfully hard to watch all the pining and the soft feelings they held for each other. Especially not knowing that the other felt the same. And so Yaku set out to get them together. But that led to things going much worse. 

It had happened on a normal day. Yaku was determined to tell Kuroo how Kenma felt about him. It was exhausting keeping it secret knowing how much Kuroo was hurting. They were in their third year so it was possible that Kuroo might not get more chances with Kenma if he was going away to college soon. Hopefully they would be able to work around that once they got together but Yaku felt like he had to give them a window to what can be, not what could've been. 

So he waited til the end of practice while they were cleaning up. Kenma had put up an excuse so he wouldn't have to walk home with Kuroo and went ahead, leaving Yaku and Kuroo alone. And so Yaku told him. Kuroo's mind had been blown. He was in so much shock, with his mouth open. 

Was it true? Did Kenma really like him back? Kuroo thought to himself. But Yaku's instincts were always right so he didn't bother with questioning why Kenma had never told him. 

And so he smiled. He smiled with all he could and decided to put his heart on his sleeve. He had decided that he was going to run after Kenma and tell him how he felt. He hugged Yaku and thanked him, promising to make it up to him later. And he ran.

It wasn't long before Kuroo saw the pudding hair. His heart swelled and he could swear that he had never been happier. He caught up to him and hugged him from behind. Kenma panicked until he turned around and saw his best friend with a smile somehow brighter than Hinata, who was the literal sun. 

"Oh? And what's this for? Did Yaku yell at you again for not cleaning properly ?"Kenma joked, trying to find his sweaty palms and the butterflies rampaging inside him.

His heart had sped up considerably.

"No silly, I just found out something amazing. Wanna know what it is?" Kuroo teased, not knowing how longer he could contain himself. 

"Nope, not in the least bit interested, can you let go of me now?"

"No. Absolutely not. You're going to run away and I'm not letting that happen"

Damn, Kenma thought to himself. He was still scared. He was scared that Kuroo might be able to feel his heart race.

" I won't run away,I promise. Lemme go" Kenma tried wiggling himself out of Kuroo's grasp

"Pinky promise?" Kenma rolled his eyes but stuck out his pinky

"Pinky promise" and with that Kuroo let go 

As soon as he had let go, Kenma turned and tried to calm himself, which was not working. 

"Hey Kenma?"

"hmm"

"I like you. And I know you like me back so I was wondering if you'd let me take you out on a date?" Kuroo held his breath after saying those words. He was still afraid despite what Yaku had said. 

Kenma froze. What was he supposed to do? He was feeling so many things at once: dread, happiness, doubt, fear, despair, love, hope, and so many other things. But which one would come out on top? Should he tell Kuroo yes or lie and break his heart? Kenma was too overcome with bad feelings. He decided to be selfish and protect himself.

"Oh, I'm sorry Kuroo I don't know how you came to that conclusion but I don't like you like that. So the answer is no. I hope we can still be friends"  
The words came tumbling out of Kenma before he even had a chance to regret it. His heart ached as he saw Kuroo's face fall and look confused. 

"What? But Yaku said..?" Kuroo could feel his heart breaking into a million pieces. He trailed off , not letting Kenma hear how close he was to crying. 

"I'm sorry Kuroo, I really am. I might as well come out and be honest. When you befriended me, I looked at you as an achievement on a game. One of the ones you get for signing up. The ones that aren't important and don't really give you good rewards,"  
Wait what was Kenma saying? Why wouldn't the words stop?  
That isn't how he truly felt. " and since then it's all been about getting more rewards and I've never seen you as a true friend, just a game. Even now you telling me, this is another achievement. I've unlocked Crush and if you were playing, then you unlocked Unrequited feelings. Looks like I won and you lost. I'm sorry."

And with that, Kenma walked home. Kuroo stood frozen, not being able to believe what had just happened. He was broken,beyond measure. He felt numb as he felt the tears going down his cheeks. How could Kenma be so heartless? He could've stopped at the first sorry. At least then, they still could've been friends. All those years meant nothing then? Kuroo's heart ached, all the words just running around his head, hurting them more and more. It reminded that he had been dumb not to see it and how wrong he had been. Everything hurt. He stood there for hours before eventually walking home in the rain.

Meanwhile, Kenma was regretting everything but he knew it was too late. He ruined everything. He felt so guilty. The tears wouldn't stop. He had a chance to get what he wanted. Why didn't he take it? Why? Why? Why? That question haunted him. All through the night. It hurt more to think that he would have to face him tomorrow at school. He woke up late the next morning, Kuroo being the one who would usually wake him. 

No more of that I guess, Kenma thought. His head ached but he needed to get going. 

For the last couple days, they avoided each other. At practice, things were a mess. Kenma couldn't set to Kuroo and when he did,Kuroo refused to hit it. Yaku thought it was ridiculous to involve personal matter into the sport that they shared and love. Kuroo was being irresponsible as team captain. Yaku was ready to beat him up, despite knowing the reason why they were like this. There was nothing that could be said to Kuroo that would convince him that Kenma hadn't meant any of the words he had said. To Yaku, it seemed like he was trying to protect himself but jeez Kenma had gone too far. 

When Hinata had heard about it, he was mad. Mad that Kenma would go that far. The setter was surprised. Hinata was rarely anything other than happy or nervous. Hinata scolded him and immediately thought of ways to fix it. 

"You go over to his house and tell him you love him. Right this minute. You're afraid and I understand that but you can't let that hold you back. Things are going to happen no matter what. You can't protect yourself every single time. Kuroo loves you, I know he does. Have you seen the way he looks at you ? I can bet you he doesn't give a damn about what you have experienced or not. He'll be happy to be all your firsts. So why don't you let yourself take a second chance and be happy? Please. Both you and Kuroo need this. Your team is falling apart and that's bad for you. Means I'll definitely beat you the next time we play. You can't let that happen alright?" Hinata said as he skipped into the sunset. 

Kenma was kind of in shock about how serious and right Hinata had been. He need to get this shit together, go apologize, and get himself a boyfriend. 

Yaku had given Kuroo a similar pep talk. But it was much harder for him to do. He was still hurt but at least he could maybe go get closure and then focus on getting his team back into shape. Maybe Yaku was right. Maybe Kenma didn't really mean any of it. Kuroo hoped that he was right because he couldn't handle heartbreak a second time. 

As soon as Kuroo had calmed his nerves a bit, he went to open the door to go over to Kenma's house. When he pulled the door open, there was a dark figure on his porch. Kuroo screamed like a little girl and went to go grab a pan.

"Jeez, Kuroo. Shut up it's just me" Kenma spoke up, itching to smile at his soon-to-be boyfriend's idiocy 

"OH MY GOD KENMA. YOU SCARED THE SHIT OUT OF ME. I'M SO GLAD IT'S YOU" Kuroo felt relieved, then soon embarrassed , and then numb. What was he doing here?

"You know, for such a smart guy, you really are missing a couple of braincells. I wanted to apologize for the other day. I lied. Everything I said was a lie. I'll do anything to make it up to you but please let me explain myself first."

Kuroo felt conflicted but nodded anyways. He needed closure.

"Okay so um I'm not sure how to even say this but I love you. I know that might be hard to believe after all the shit I said. You're not a game. You're a human. Whose my annoying best friend with annoyingly good bed head. I'm so sorry I played with your feelings. I didn't know what to say because I was scared. I'm still scared. That I'm not enough or that I don't measure up to your expectations of what a relationship should be.

But I'm willing to risk it because I want to be with you. I know you're not a game or an achievement but if you were then you won my heart. You're the type of achievement that gives you rewards that last you a lifetime. You mean everything to me." Kenma finished,proud of himself for doing it. He hoped Kuroo could forgive him.

Kuroo was surprised. When had Kenma gotten this confident and reckless? Usually that was him. He was happy though. Somehow those words had been able to glue back his heart and he felt at peace. But he decided he was still going to tease him a bit. 

"Hmmm, I don't know. You really hurt my feelings, I'm not sure I'll be able to forgive you but I know how you can make it up to me." Kuroo's smile gave away all his intentions though, Kenma felt relieved. 

"Oh? and what is it?"Kenma got closer until he was at Kuroo's feet and looking up. 

"Take me out on a date and ask me to be your boyfriend?" Kuroo mumbled as he got flustered at how cute Kenma looked with his bright red cheeks

"I was just about to do that ,you idiot. Now shut up and let me kiss you." Kenma said as he lifted his arms for Kuroo to lift him up

He lifted him up and soon Kenma pressed their lips together. It was warmth neither had ever felt before.

If you ask me, I think they both won the game. 


End file.
